Canada readies itself for Hair of the Human that Bit You

After 17 October 2018, when in Canada cannabis becomes legally available to the general public for the purpose of mass stupefaction, the popular but ineffective hangover remedy, “hair of the dog that bit you” will require the corollary in the headline above.

Recently, a man in the UK, perhaps attempting to shake off the after-effects of overindulging in that most innocent of narcotics, cannabis, became not only an aphoristic literalist but so euphorically witless that he was unable to notice the distinction between biter and bitee.

“Beware of the Human” signs will be available at your local Humane Society.

From here:

A cruel pet owner admitted to leaving his dog with horrific injuries by biting him while high on cannabis.

Tyler Laverick, 20, confessed that he sunk his teeth into his eight-month-old Staffordshire Bull Terrier named Diesel, last October.

At an initial hearing in April, the court was told that Diesel was seized by police after members of the public reported seeing the dog being assaulted by a male.

Officers attended Laverick’s former home in North Shields and found the pet with horrific injuries to his face, eyes and ears, inside the residence.

The court heard that when asked how the pet suffered the visible wounds to his head, Laverick responded by saying: ‘I was biting him, I was stoned’.

One thought on “Canada readies itself for Hair of the Human that Bit You

  1. Wow. “MAN BITES DOG” is not a joke but, in fact, an apt newspaper headline.

    Charles Spurgeon, in his exposition of Psalm 8:5-6, quotes David Clarkson as follows:

    “But by this natural corruption he that was but a little lower than angels is now something below the beasts. He was to have dominion, but is made baser than those over whom he rules. They were put under his feet, but now he is as low as they. This is the sad issue of natural corruption.”

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