Scientists from the Austrian Academy of Sciences have grown miniature human brains from skin cells. The diminutive organs are providing a unique insight into how those equipped with pea sized brains – Anglican Church of Canada bishops and atheists, for example – still manage to think.
One of the qualifications for being a Canadian politician seems to be to have smoked marijuana. A new study suggests that smoking marijuana as an adolescent may cause permanent brain damage; this explains the state of Canadian politics. Luckily a pea sized replacement may soon be available.
President Obama is considering bombing Syria for using gas against Syrian “rebels”, thereby hastening the takeover of Syria by rabid Islamists bent upon the destruction of the West. This is the same gas that, according to Andrew White the Vicar of Baghdad, was hastily moved from Iraq to Syria in 2003. So Obama is planning on attacking Syria for using WMDs that he believes don’t exist. Meanwhile, Donald Rumsfeld, an Iraq war hawk, is denouncing Obama for contemplating military action in Syria. Sometimes I long for the days when people were more predictable.
The Oxford English Dictionary has added a definition of “twerking” to its online (not print) version. It means to “dance to popular music in a sexually provocative manner involving thrusting hip movements and a low, squatting stance”; for those who, unlike me, wish to perfect the “dance”, there is an instructional video here. As I am sure everyone knows by now, the gyration – which is not unlike a manoeuvre my dog performs when his rectum is itching – has been rendered mainstream by Miley Cyrus, née Hannah Montana, the last hope of Western culture and someone my daughter-in-law really doesn’t want her daughter copying. Not to worry: by the time my granddaughter is a teenager there will be something worse to emulate.
While we are on the subject of dictionaries, my built-in Firefox dictionary has “Osama” in its database but not “Obama”. At least we know who is sinking into obscurity faster.
Scientists can grow miniature human brains or other organs. But only God can create humans in His own image. Only God can create life and gives eternal life to the followers of Jesus.
One day a group of scientists got together and decided that man had come a long way and no longer needed God. So they picked one scientist to go and tell Him that they were done with Him.
The scientist walked up to God and said, “God, we’ve decided that we no longer need you. We’re to the point that we can clone people and do many miraculous things, so why don’t you just go on and get lost.”
God listened very patiently and kindly to the man and after the scientist was done talking, God said, “Very well, how about this, let’s say we have a man making contest.” To which the scientist replied, “OK, great!”
But God added, “Now, we’re going to do this just like I did back in the old days with Adam.”
The scientist said, “Sure, no problem” and bent down and grabbed himself a handful of dirt.
God just looked at him and said, “No, no, no. You go get your own dirt!”
God can say: “Sure, you can use my dirt”. Only God created the universe out of nothing. If humans succeed in producing life from previously nonliving material, they will have begun with matter. Such production will not undercut the greatness of God’s power and knowledge; it will simply underscore it.
The instructional video – which I admittedly skipped through – made me feel vaguely dirty afterwards. It also made me feel sad.
In the early 19th century everyone was talking about the works of Beethoven; romantic ballet had reached its zenith; the Founding Fathers of the U.S. had applied their refined philosophy of political Liberalism to the crafting of a fundamentally democratic new state.
But now, 200 years later, in the early 21st century everyone is talking about is how to rock your posterior backwards and forwards.
What a cultural advancement we have made.