{"id":4136,"date":"2009-05-11T22:06:55","date_gmt":"2009-05-12T02:06:55","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/anglicansamizdat.wordpress.com\/?p=4136"},"modified":"2009-05-11T22:06:55","modified_gmt":"2009-05-12T02:06:55","slug":"24","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.anglicansamizdat.net\/wordpress\/24\/","title":{"rendered":"24"},"content":{"rendered":"

10:00 a.m. \u2013 12:00 p.m.<\/strong> (Season Opener)
\nTerrorists known cryptically as TEC-ACoC take hostages in Jamaica.<\/p>\n

12:00 a.m. -1:00 a.m.<\/strong>
\nHostages are identified: Truth; Gospel; Honesty; Integrity (the original one).<\/p>\n

1:00 p.m. – 2:00 p.m.<\/strong>
\nTerrorists assail hostages with a newly developed mind-numbing bio-weapon: the Indaba. Civilians all over the Island are wailing and clutching at their heads.<\/p>\n

2:00 p.m. \u2013 3:00 p.m.<\/strong>
\nCounter-terrorists are dispatched from far flung reaches of Christendom with a single purpose: rescue the hostages.<\/p>\n

3:00 p.m. \u2013 4:00 p.m.<\/strong>
\nTerrorists and Counter-terrorists do battle; Indabas are wielded to dreadful effect. The carnage is terrible.<\/strong><\/p>\n

<\/strong><\/p>\n

4:00 p.m. \u2013 5:00 p.m.<\/strong>
\nCounter-terrorists wheel in the big gun: the Fourth Moratorium.<\/p>\n

5:00 p.m. \u2013 6:00 p.m.<\/strong>
\nThe Fourth Moratorium suffers defeat through trickery and sleight of hand. One of the counter-terrorists, although he speaks 5 languages, didn\u2019t know what \u201clitigation\u201d means and no-one bothered to explain it.<\/p>\n

6:00 p.m. \u2013 7:00 p.m.<\/strong>
\nCounter-terrorists wheel in the other big gun: Section 4 of “The Covenant”.<\/p>\n

7:00 p.m. \u2013 8:00 p.m.<\/strong>
\nBattle rages around Section 4; the Indabas go at it hammer and tongs decimating all in their path.<\/p>\n

8:00 p.m. \u2013 9:00 p.m.<\/strong>
\nSection 4 falls.<\/p>\n

9:00 p.m. – 10:00 p.m.<\/strong>
\nTerrorists counter attack with Resolution A.<\/p>\n

10:00 p.m. \u2013 1:00 a.m.<\/strong> (Mid-Season Cliffhanger)
\nResolution A suffers apparent defeat but is actually smuggled out of the room and secreted in Resolution C which has disguised itself as Resolution B.<\/p>\n

1:00 a.m. \u2013 2:00 a.m.<\/strong>
\nResolution C calls for the hostages to remain in terrorist custody until they die from too much conversation.<\/p>\n

2:00 a.m. \u2013 3:00 a.m.<\/strong>
\nArch-terrorist Rowan the Enforcer deploys the ultimate weapon: he speaks.<\/p>\n

3:00 a.m. \u2013 4:00 a.m.<\/strong>
\nIt is all too much after the Indaba attack: terrorists and counter-terrorists alike writhe on the floor in agony. Some bite off their own tongues. Rowan the enforcer smiles benignly<\/p>\n

4:00 a.m. \u2013 5:00 a.m.<\/strong>
\nA temporary truce is called while all descend on the local population to pillage their food supplies.<\/p>\n

5:00 a.m. \u2013 6:00 a.m.<\/strong>
\nBack at it. Stunned journalists try to make sense of the carnage.<\/p>\n

6:00 a.m. \u2013 7:00 a.m.<\/strong>
\nTruth; Gospel; Honesty; Integrity are battered and still hostage.<\/p>\n

7:00 a.m. \u2013 8:00 a.m.<\/strong>
\nThe terrorists have won: the hostages will be subject to extreme interrogation techniques to break down their resistance – dialogue, group discernment and if all else fails, the Listening Process, said to be capable of boring the balls off a buffalo in 30 seconds.<\/p>\n

8:00 a.m. \u2013 10:00 a.m.<\/strong> (Season Finale)
\nThe terrorists begin to write accounts of the battle that make them appear like the good-guys. Everyone goes home wondering what just happened.<\/p>\n

Did anyone understand that? It doesn\u2019t matter: what is important is the violence, blood, gore, torture, screaming and the fact that 24 will be returning for another season next year.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

10:00 a.m. \u2013 12:00 p.m. (Season Opener) Terrorists known cryptically as TEC-ACoC take hostages in Jamaica. 12:00 a.m. -1:00 a.m. Hostages are identified: Truth; Gospel; Honesty; Integrity (the original one). 1:00 p.m. – 2:00 p.m. Terrorists assail hostages with a … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"iawp_total_views":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[14,53],"tags":[2030,2059],"class_list":["post-4136","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-anglican","category-bishops-gone-wild","tag-anglican","tag-bishops-gone-wild"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.anglicansamizdat.net\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4136","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.anglicansamizdat.net\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.anglicansamizdat.net\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.anglicansamizdat.net\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.anglicansamizdat.net\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4136"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.anglicansamizdat.net\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4136\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.anglicansamizdat.net\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4136"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.anglicansamizdat.net\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4136"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.anglicansamizdat.net\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4136"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}