Anglican church attendance in North America will continue to decline.<\/p>\n
Katherine Jefferts-Schori and Fred Hiltz will stem the tide by continuing to speak with a prophetic voice: they will apologise for their heterosexuality and will work to aspire more closely to the homosexual ideal.<\/p>\n
Some heterosexual clergy will have a sex change operation so that they can more fully express their inner homosexuality.<\/p>\n
Other, more moderate clergy will become cross-dressers.<\/p>\n
Rowan Williams will shave his beard in order to appear more effeminate.<\/p>\n
Katherine Jefferts-Schori will start wearing makeup in order to appear more effeminate.<\/p>\n
Gene Robinson will realise that nothing he can do will make him appear more effeminate.<\/p>\n
Robinson will declare that he is living proof that there is a gay gene.<\/p>\n
Conversations and dialogue will continue on the meaning of the word “evangelism”. The provisional conclusion will be that it means “inclusion”.<\/p>\n
The North American dioceses that favour more inclusion will demand oaths of allegiance to the bishop before members are allowed to take Communion. This is how they will evangelise.<\/p>\n
Fred Hiltz will continue to encourage Canadian dioceses to honour the moratorium on same sex blessings – to the greatest extent possible.<\/p>\n
Fred Hiltz will preside at same sex blessing ceremonies in the dioceses of New Westminster, Niagara, Montreal and Ottawa.<\/p>\n
A mole in the diocese of Niagara will leak that Michael Bird wears platform shoes.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Anglican church attendance in North America will continue to decline. Katherine Jefferts-Schori and Fred Hiltz will stem the tide by continuing to speak with a prophetic voice: they will apologise for their heterosexuality and will work to aspire more closely … Continue reading